Tumblr Scrollbars
I am Willington
Cute Tumblr Themes

queefilicious:

that woman you just called fat? it’s the moon. that boy you just called ugly? it’s a bike. that woman you called anorexic? that’s a lamppost. the man you called gay for kissing his boyfriend? its a woman. you need glasses.

thespacegoat:

straight girls tho, do you ever get confused by your sexuality because not only do men suck but also like 90% of women are fucking bombshells and only like 20% of men are like most chicks could pass for models and most men could pass for bridge trolls i mean wow

rninor:

weepingdildo:

landorus:

lets have phone sex over walkie talkies

"I’ll make you moan, over"

"bend over"
"bend what? over"

"Depressed? Do something that makes you happy!"

little-sound:

edrecoveryprobs:

image

I HAVE NEVER SEEN THIS EXPLAINED BETTER THANK YOU SQUIDWARD

alex-of-macedonia:

theplanlaugh:

So my dad has this new idea: Take this wonderful wasabi thing

image

Turn it into beautiful, small rectangles, wrap it in laminated paper and put it in a trident box, so that it’ll look like this:

image

Give it to someone when they ask you for gum and watch as their mouth burns. Enjoy.

image

nyctophxilia:

I like my women curvy. lots and lots of curves. so many curves. maybe even a spiral shape. with ketchup. my ideal woman is actually curly fry.

aflockofseagulls:

let’s play a game called “how much of this homework can i do in school tomorrow”

totheinternetandbeyond:

I went to a catholic elementary school with a really strict dress code and one time in 4th grade I came to school with my shirt untucked 2 days in a row and my teacher asked me if I was having problems at home

tsarbucks:

when the person u hate does something that makes everyone else hate them:

image